THEPAPNEWS

April 11th 2010

Ruckus The Horse
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Ruckus has Kentucky Derby winners in his bloodline, so his purchase price of $15,000 was considered a steal. But bloodlines don't guarantee a champion.
When Ruckus failed to do well in races and couldn't compete physically as a jumper, he found himself homeless faster than you can open a starting gate. Luckily, he came to live at Best Friends Animal Sanctuary, where a horse's worth is never measured by a stopwatch.
Eventually, Ruckus was adopted by a family who took care of him for five years. But when they recently moved and couldn't take a horse with them, he came back to the sanctuary.
At Best Friends, he'll have a home as long as he needs one - and he'll always be our champion!
For more information, please visit www.bestfriends.org.

April 10th 2010

Lottery Nightmare
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In 1990, Rhoda and Alex Toth were down to their last $24 when they bought a winning Florida Lottery ticket and cashed in on a $13 million jackpot.
But the blessing quickly turned into a curse. The couple, who said they hoped the money would buy them a "quiet life," high-rolled their way through the fortune and now Rhoda Toth is destined to spend the next chapter of her rags-to-riches-to-rags saga in a federal penitentiary for cheating the IRS out of more than $500,000.
Her husband would be joining her, but he died last year after they filed for bankruptcy.
The Toths spent their money on gambling, generous gifts and the high life.
Along the way, the loot caused a feud with Rhoda's son from a previous marriage.
In 1997, when their fantasy was beginning to unravel, Rhoda said the money "has torn us apart. It caused us to lose a lot of friends, some family member. Sometimes, I wish we could give it back."
But they didn't give it back - and even tried to scam illict tax refunds by filing faulty returns, the IRS charges.
Now Rhoda has lost her friends, her husband - and her freedom. Judge Elizabeth Kovachevich sentenced her to two years in prison.

April 9th 2010

Bao Xishun Is One Tall Guy
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The Mongolian shepherd who lost the title of "world's tallest man" two years ago can stand proud again - because Guinness has given it back!
Boa Xishun, 7-foot-9 and 57 years old, regained his official standing as world's tallest man when his successor, Ukranian Leonid Stadnyk, refused to be measured by the Guinness team.
Stadnyk won the title in 2006, after his doctor sent a copy of his measurements to the Guinness World Records staff.
At the time, they accepted the doctor's word that Stadnyk measured a whopping 8-foot-5.5 inches tall. But a new policy made it necessary for a group of specialists to measure Stadnyk six times in one day, lying down and standing up.
"We realized there was such interest in these categories to do with height that it was too important a category for us to leave it to a doctor alone," explains Craig Glenday, editor-in-chief of Guinness World Records.
Bao agreed to be measured, but Stadnyk says he never wanted the attention that comes with being a record-holder.
"He has gone on record saying he doesn't want to be bothered," explains Glenday. "Basically, he doesn't want the fame and publicity that comes with being the world's tallest man."
Stadnyk, who lives with his mother in a remote village, has publicly declared that his height is a burden.
"The world is built for medium-sized people," he said in a recent interview.
But Bao, the once and future champ, felt his height put him on top of the world.
"He was a bit of a recluse - he looked after goats," explains Glenday. "Then the fame that he got from being a Guinness World Record holder meant that he found himself a wife."
Bao married 5-foot-6 Xia Shujian in July 2007. They're expecting their first child later this year.
He also used his fame for compassionate causes. In December 2006, wildlife officials brough Bao to the aid of two river dolphins.
He used his exceptionally long arms to reach into the endangered animals' stomachs and pull out pieces of plastic.

April 8th 2010
Ghost At A Wedding
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A young guest at a wedding reception took more than flattering pictures of the bride and groom - he captured the image of a ghostly guest!
Jordan Martin was snapping away as newlyweds Nigel and Helen Davis swayed to their first dance as man and wife.
"I didn't see the ghost until a couple of days later when I was looking at the pictures I downloaded on my computer," says Jordan, 12. "When I saw it, I was like, 'Wow!' I couldn't believe what I was seeing - a real ghost in the picture."
Jordan's mom, Ann, was just as flabbergasted to see the disembodied head and shoulders of a woman floating beside the DJ booth as the happy couple twirled around the floor.
"It was a shock when I saw it," Ann says. "It looks very clear and real to me. Jordan is quite excited about it."
Paranormal expert Jasper Jenkins heard about the amazing photograph and initiated an investigation of the wedding hall.
"Once I delved into the history of the building, I discovered the identity of the uninvited guest," Jenkins explains.
"Another wedding celebration was supposed to be held there back in 1948, but the groom apparently got cold feet and left his bride at the altar.
"The poor woman was so brokenhearted, she hung herself from a rafter in the center of the dance floor a week later."
"And rather than cross over the other side, she had lingered all these years at the site of her tragic death."
Jenkins and his crew, from Northway, England, spent a weekend gathering evidence, of the jilted bride's ghost.
"We have an array of electronic equipment - photographic, audio and measuring devices - designed for paranormal investigations," says Jenkins. "Unfortunately, we weren't able to get any pictures or videos of her, but we did get a recording of the spirit's voice."
"In fact, she scared the devil out of us around 3 a.m., shrieking at the top of her lungs and nearly blowing out the microphones!"
The psychic sleuths' atmospheric monitor also registered a 30-degree drop in the temperature of the room that was simultaneous with the blood-curdling scream.
"It was frustrating that she stubbornly remained invisible to our cameras," Jenkins admits. "But with the evidence we did collect, I have no doubt her haunting spirit is the real deal."

April 7th 2010
Ruby Roman Grapes Sold For $910 In Japan
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The price of fruit may be on the rise in the U.S., but it's nothing compared to Japan, where a bunch of grapes recently sold for $910!
The manager of a high-class hotel bought the costly Ruby Roman grapes to impress his upscale customers.
"We believe the price was probably a record high," says agricultural official Hirofumi Isu. "They're delicious - sweet but fresh at the same time, very well-balanced."
The bunch of 35 grapes were each a bit smaller than Ping-Pong balls and sold at auction in the Ishikawa region.
The tomato-colored fruit - which cost a jaw-dropping $26 per grape -- is a new premium variety developed by a government-sponsored project begun in 1994.
Japanese consumers are accustomed to paying top yen for fruit, and consider it especially prestigious to buy the first crop of the year.

April 6th 2010
The Stone Circles Of The Neolithic Period
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Thousands of mysterious circular carvings dating back to the Stone Age prove that aliens visited our ancient ancestors, say researchers who've finally solved the riddle of the engravings.
Experts have long puzzled over the strange loops and whorls carved into cliff faces and stony clearings during the Neolithic period, 4,000 to 6,000 years ago.
Unlike cave paintings that feature outlines of hands and likenesses of prehistoric animals, these cravings show elaborate geometric patterns consisting of circles with cirlces.
"The resemblance of these remote carvings to contemporary crop circles is undeniable," explains archaeologist Dr. Robinson Fellowes. "Numerous theories have suggested that the stone circles were used in religious rituals or as some kind of territorial markers."
"But the one explanation consistent with all the facts is that the carvings are somehow related to encounters with UFOs."
Fellowes and other experts have identified 2,500 locations across the north of England where ancient humans gathered around the mysterious circles, including more than 100 engravings discovered only in the last four years.
Some of the carvings show signs of being made with stone or bone-cutting tools. But others show faint traces of scorched earth and rock melted by extreme heat, as if shaped by modern drilling tools or technologically advanced cutting lasers.
Little is known of the culture that flourished in Stone Age Great Britain. Experts believe society had made its first technological breakthrough, graduating from the simple life of hunting and gathering to planting crops, building homes and making the first astronomical observations to mark the seasons for sowing and harvesting.
"This was also the period when humans built the first known observatory, the massive monuments of Stonehenge," Fellowes explains. "All of a sudden, humankind had two driving interests."
"We were fascinated by geometrically perfect circular shapes, and we were mesmerized by the movements of the stars."
"This sudden development makes perfect sense in the context of ancient UFOs descending near the first human settlements."
Kate Wilson, an inspector of ancient monuments for English Heritage, the government- sponsored organization identifying and cataloguing the ancient circles, explains that the rock carvings are usually found in sites dedicated to worshiping unerathly beings.
"Those places where mountains touch the sky or the sea reaches the shore are often considered the domain of super natural ancestors," Wilson says. "Most rock art is found in those areas."
Scholars of ancient civilizations have uncovered numerous clues that UFOs visited Earth in the distant past. Prehistoric statues depict astronauts in space suits riding rockets, and paintings from North Africa and western China show tall, slender humanoids descending from the sky in glowing circular vehicles.
Some experts have even theorized that ancient astronauts helped erect the Mayan and Egyptian pyramids, aided in the construction of massive temples in India and were responsible for the eerie geometric designs on Peru's Nazca Plain, visible only from the air.
"The British stone carvings exist in areas where crop circles still appear overnight," explains Fellowes. "It could be that the UFOs somehow marked these places thousands of years ago and then left for some distant destination."
"Now and then, they return and seek out the human settlements they once had dealings with - and leave the circles so we recognize and remember them."

April 5th 2010
How To Get Your Way - Always!
Whether you're coaxing a toddler to eat his veggies or attempting to change a pal's point of view, the art of persuasion is vital to everyday life.
"It's the way we build consensus and common purpose," explains psychologist Eric Knowles, of the University of Arkansas.
Here, based of the latest scientific research, are eight effective ways to get what you want:
1. Be A Chameleon - Mirror the hand gestures, head movements and posture of the person you're trying to convince. Subtle mimicry is quite powerful and often elicts a positive response.
2. Remove Resistance - Offer arguments close to your target's position while using charm to bolster their self-esteem. Feeling good about themselves will increase their receptiveness.
3. Gender Matters - Women are more successful in convincing other females in face-to-face meetings. Men, who are naturally competitive, respond positively to written communication.
4. Frame Your Case - Present your views in a favorable light and use negative terms to describe the differing opinion. Pessimism about an opposing outlook is a forceful tactic that will win the day.
5. Be Relentless - Gently but firmly refuse to let the topic die until you've broken down the other person's defenses. Young children are masters of nagging their parents into submission.
6 Keep It Short - Rather than launch into an avalanche of reasons your idea is best, offer one or two positive thoughts to the person you're trying to persuade. Succinctness produces confidence in your judgement.
7. Style Matters - When delivering your idea, make an effort to speak clearly and without long pauses or hesitant language. The more steadfast you appear, the more believable you will become.
8. Anger Works - Hit the person's hot button while describing the problem. Once their emotions are charged up, propose your suggestion as the only logical remedy to the situation.

April 4th 2010
Childhood Alzheimer's
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Faced with the devastating diagnosis that their precious 7-year-old son has dementia, his valiant parents are making the most of every moment with their boy.
Andrew and Lyndsay Scott knew something was wrong when Ben was slow to develop as an infant.
"Whenever I mentioned my concerns, the doctor would say, 'Oh, it's just a boy thing, he'll grow out of it," recalls Lyndsay, 30.
Ben finally walked at 17 months, but he often fell, as if tripping over something that wasn't there.
"His speech was also slow," Lyndsay says. "By the time he started primary school, he could communicate and put three or four words together, but his speech was quite slurred."
At age 6, Ben was far behind his peers - unable to read, write or even hold a pencil. But his pediatrician continued to insist there wasn't a problem.
The last straw came when their child became incontinent. That's when the Scotts contacted neurologist Dr. Philip Jardine, who discovered Ben suffered from the rare genetic disorder called Niemann-Pick. The Alzheimer's-like condition causes cholesterol deposits to surround all vital organs, leading to mental and physical dementia and eventual death between ages of 15 and 20.
"Right now, his symptoms are a bit like he's drunk a bottle of vodka," Andrew explains. "It's quite hard to watch at the moment. He puts food in his mouth but he forgets to chew."
Despite their heartache, Lyndsay and Andrew are grateful Ben is blissfully unaware of his condition and that for the time being his memory remains intact.
"I find myself constantly looking at his face when he smiles, so I can remember him that way," Lyndsay says. "I want to remember that in his head, Ben is happy."
"Today is the best he is going to be, and we have to love evry minute."
"Every day is about making memories of the time we have."
Unfortunately, there's no predicting how fast the disease will consume their son, eventually leaving him in a vegetative state.
"I'm trying to come to terms with the fact that I'll outlive my child," Lyndsay says. "It's surreal - like I'm talking about someone else's life."

April 3rd 2010
Grumpy Old Women?
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The common belief that old men are more cantankerous than their female counterparts has been blown out of the water by a new study proving senior ladies are the real pains in the neck!
The latest research shows women are the sadder sex by age 48 - a time when males are actually enjoying the best years of their lives.
"In later life, men come closer to achieving their aspirations, are more satisfied with their family lives and financial situations, and are the happier of the two," declares sociologist Dr. Anke Plagnol.
The answers of the 10,000 participants in the Cambridge University study revealed that while women start life more satisfied, they are far less happy than their male friends and co-workers in their later years.
These new findings are a total contradiction of the English Longitudinal Study of Aging, reported previously on ThePapNews, which stated that older women were the more positive gender.
The more recent survey also revealed that women often achieve their dreams of a happy marriage and career earlier in life, while the same period in a man's life is usually the saddest.
Younger men report more dissatisfaction over money than young women because they're striving to make much more.
But with maturity comes a more upbeat outlook for married men. Meanwhile, older women are more likely to be widowed and struggling financially in their later years because of their longer life span.

April 2nd 2010
Toby Klauenberg's Bronze Clown Shoe Award
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Fun-loving Toby Klauenberg spent his life making people laugh - and now he's been rewarded with the highest honor of his profession, the Bronze Clown Shoe!
Klauenberg, of Des Moines, Iowa, received the award before a convention of his peers in Chicago. The designation as a "master clown" places him among the top in greasepaint peformers along with Bozo, Emmett Kelly and Ronald McDonald.
"The winner is chosen by other master clowns, so the recognition of my body of work is a huge honor," says Klauenberg. "This title joyously represents the end: The end of the nightmares of being inadequately talented to be a clown."
"The nightmares won't end, but now my wife can use the bronze shoe to smack me awake!"
Despite his self-deprecating humor, Klauenberg graduated from Iowa State University with an education degree and has managed to make a good living clowning around.
Working under the moniker "Toby Kid," he began his career with performances at theme parks and elementary schools.
As his popularity grew, Klauenberg moved into standup comedy, corporate entertainment and opened a booking agency, Funny Farm, with his wife Jennifer.
The busy joker even gained a national reputation as the best clown coach in the business.
With his latest achievement, all his boyhood dreams have come true and he never plans to stop making people smile.
"I've always, always wanted to be a clown ever since I was 6 years old," says Klauenberg, 45. "I hope I die clowning."

April 1st 2010
Julia Child - Spy?
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Secret agent 007 has nothing on super-chef Julia Child, reveal documents recently declassified by the CIA.
The jolly gourmet was a key spook in American intelligence gathering in Europe during World War II as a part of the Office of Strategic Services (OSS), the precursor to the CIA.
OSS agents were assigned to study Nazi military plans, infiltrate enemy organizations and inspire resistance.
Membership information was a closely guarded national secret, with even close family members being blocked from discovering if their relatives had once worked as spies.
But former CIA Director William Casey, who had also been an OSS agent, began changing the policies that prevented the release of World War II-era documents.
More than 35,000 personnel files have been finally handed over to the National Archives.
In addition to Child, the roster includes notable secret agents like actor Sterling Hayden, Supreme Court Justice Athur Goldberg, White Sox cather Moe Berg, President Kennedy's special assistant Arthur Schlesinger Jr., Ernest Hemmingway's son John and President Theodore Roosevelt's sons Quentin and Kermit.
"I think it's terrific," raves former OSS agent Elizabeth McIntosh, 93, of Woodbridge, Virginia. "They've finally, after all these years, gotten the names out."

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Urban Word Of The Day
recrap

To sum up a discussion composed largely of useless bullshit.

Person 1: "Tell me how the staff meeting went."
Person 2: "Allow me to recrap..."

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